Tamil SMS Jokes & Tamil Kavithaigal

Malika sherawat goes to skin doctor and ask, “Main nahatay waqat kya lagaoun?”

Doctor: “bathroom ki kundi.”

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Chaewala ladki dekh kar bola: bholi is soorat, ankhaon mein masti, dur khadi sharmaye, aae haaye,

Ladki boli: kali is surat, haath me ketli, dur khara chilaye, chae chae.

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Boy says 2 girl: tute hue dil se pyar karogi ya dil tutne tak pyar karogi.

Girl says: tuti hui chapal se pite Ga ya chappal tutne tak pitega.

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Chemistry ki class main teacher NE ek larki se pucha what is “Nitrate”?

Larki Sharma kar boli: “sir, night rate 1500/-, aur hotel charges alag honge.”

Husband : suit bara sohna paya ay
Wife : thx g
Husband : lipstick bhi sohni lagai ay
Wife : thx g
Husband : Makeup vi sohna kitta ay
Wife : thx g
Husband : sohni fir vi nahi lagdi
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Evolutin of man:

Shadi k pehle : I love u
Shadi k baad : aaj phir alu?

Shadi k pehle : Hero no1
Shadi k baad: coolie no1

Shadi k pehle : mein NE piyar kiya
Shadi k baad : ye mein NE kiya kiya?

Shadi k pehle : janeman mut jao,
Shadi k baad : jaan mut khao

Shaadi k pehle : tum bin raha na jay
Shaadi k baad : tum ko saha na jay

Shadi k pehle : kuch to bolo
Shadi k baad : kabhi chup bhi ho jaya karo.

Shadi k pehle : tum kab aaogi?
Shadi k baad : mayke kab jaogi?
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Beta: Daddy meri dur ki nazar kamzor ho gae hai mujhe ek chashma la do.
Kanjos baap bete ko bahar Le kar aya aur bola who kya hai Bata.
Beta: Suraj
Baap: aur kitna dur dhaikhe Ga?
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Sardar ji to his friend: Yar bari mushkil main hoon meri bivi mujh say aik kiss ka 100 RS laiti hay …..

Friend: acha, yar to bara lucky hay doosron say to wo 500rs laiti hay.

What is the diff. Between dava & daru?

Ans: Dava is like girlfriend that comes with expiry date.
Daru is like WIFE, jitni PURANI hogi UTNA sir CHAD ke bolegi…

Kutta mar gaya rajaai mein,
Main paagal ho gaya teri judaai mein
Haathi nadi mein beh nahin sakta,Apun tere bina reh nahin sakta…

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Tumsa koi doosra zameen par hua,
Toh Rab se shikayat hogi….

Ek toh jhella nahi jaata,
Doosra AA gaya to kya halat hogi!!!

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Sharab sharir ko khatam karti hai
Sharab samaj ko khatam karti hai
Aao aaj is sharab ko khatam karte hai
Ek botal tum khatam karo ek hum khatam karte hai.

A man from Agra went to Ajmer. His wife was in her parent’s house in Delhi .

When the man went to Ajmer, he asked his servant to send a telegram to his wife indicating about his trip to Ajmer.

He sent a telegram. When the wife received the telegram, she fainted.

It was written:

‘Sethji aaj mar ! Gaye! (Sethji Ajmer gaye )

A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams, which the father receives as:

“father, your daughter has been successful in BED.”

Maana teri nazar me tera pyaar hum nahi,

Kese kahe ki tere talabdaar hum nahi,

Khud ko jala ke khak kar daala,mita diya,

Lo AB tumhari raah mein diwar hum nahi.

Ji ko sawara humne tamannao ke khun se,

Gulshan mein uss bahar ke haqdar hum nahi,

Dhoka diya hai khud ko mahobbat ke naam se

Kese kahe ki gunehgar hum nahi.

Phir usi chand se rishta bana baithe,

Phir usi saadgi se fareb kha baithe,

Pathron se they taalukaat hamare,

Phir bhee sheeshe ka ghar bana baithe.

“Dil” ka dard jab panno par Aa jata hai

“Ek” Aansu b dariya ban jata hai

“Dil” k Tutne ki “Aawaz” bhi nahi aur

Sara dard “GAZAL” ban jata hai.

Waqt NE sari kahani hi badal dali,

Pyar ka naam Jo aata hai to Dar lagta hai,

Zakham kuch aise bhi apno NE diye hai mujhko,

AB koi haath milata hai to Dar lagta hai,